(Photo by smoothdude from flickr)"Marriage is one sacred union between man and woman tied by a common vow to cleave to each other till death separate them." Whether you agree with me or not, marriage is instituted by God. He is the author of marriage, thus, He alone has the power to snatch one partner from the other. Or let them stay in love with each other for as long as they live. The common situation nowadays, is nothing else than a temporal union. There are lot of young couple today separate as early as three years of marriage or even lower. It's very unfortunate that marriage is no longer consider as sacred but something a couple (wants to experiment and undone after a whirlwind romance.
In contrast, I witness a couple as old as 80 years of age, married for about 50 years but their bond had grown stronger in time. There is no special secret, like other young couple today, these old folks had also gone through lots of quarrels, disagreements and incompatibilities as common to others. Their marriage had also been swayed for sometime, but managed to stick together. They had of course, undergone the test of time. And this test of time is one factor that many couples agree in fulfilling a lasting relationship.
Old couples who have been married for more than 50 years belong to the era when they experienced, hard manual labor, scarcity of foods, post war damages, emotional depression and spritual struggle. These things made the couple cleave to each other even more for comfort and solace.
When Adam and Eve were banished from Eden, they had no one to turn to , thus clinging to each others arms, they accepted God's punishment quietly. They have stopped blaming each other but took their responsibility to each other as husband and wife also as parents to their children.
In parallel situation, the financial hardship a couple is experiencing may drive them closely together as they eager to solve problems on their own. As they perform their task together they discover the significance of each one. Compare to the affluent who have their rich independent jobs and almost tied down to each jobs that they have no time for each other anymore. Where you spend most of your time is where your passion develops and too much of it can blow your head off-balance that can be absorbs by your partner. Such negatives traits as greediness, selfishness, insecurities, jealousy, may come to the picture and ruin the couples' relationship. Sad to say, most of the separated women I talked to were the active, independent type who were left to handle the responsibility of being a single parent.
I read a book on "A Biblical Portrait of Marriage" by Dr. Bruch H. Wilkinson This is a kind of workbook that is being used in course on establishing a God-controlled marriage. The teaching were all based on the Bible on its portrait of Marriage. I just one to take the brief discussions on the course with some pointers to follow:
1). The Role of the Couple - to leave the parents domain and live as one flesh.
Genesis 2:18, 23-24
"And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife; and they shall be one flesh
Matthew 19:4-6
"And He answered and said to them, Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female." and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."
2. The responsibility of the Couple - To cleave to each other
Hebrews 13: 4
"Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge"
I Corinthians 7:3
"Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband"
3. The role of the husband as the head
Ephesians 5:23
"For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the bod. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her"
I Corinthian 11:3, 8-9
"But I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. For man is not from woman, but woman from man. Nor was man created for the woman, but woman for the man"
I Peter 3:7" Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered"
4. The role of the wife as helper
Titus 2:4-5
"That they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed."
5. The responsibility of the husband to love his wife
Colossians 3:19
"Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them"
Ephesians 5:28-33
"So husbands ought to love their own wive as their own bodies; he who loves is wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church, Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband"
6. The responsibility of the wife is to submit to her husband
Ephesians 5:24,33
"Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.
I Peter 3:1-3
"Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear."
The couple may not achieve the ideal or the perfect marriage but abiding on God's Word would guide them towards achieving a lasting relationship.
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